Whether you are scrolling through your social feeds, have the news on the telly or are walking past headlines in the supermarket on your way to pick up bread and milk it is hard to miss the devastation of this present moment across the globe. What is even harder for some is escaping it. We are finding ourselves in month 20 of a global pandemic (yes it has been that long), and in those 20 months the punches have not stopped coming. On a global level, we see unrest and wars, the current state of affairs in Afghanistan is absolutely heartbreaking to watch, and appears to be flooding media outlets. On a community level lockdowns continue and appear to come out of the blue and be never-ending, followed by fierce debates on vaccination to the point of personal attacks leaving vulnerable people feeling even more confused and vulnerable whether they are for or against the process, and on a personal level many are dealing with grief and loss in several shapes and forms and still trying to adjust to the 'not-so-new ever changing new normal" It is easy to get lost in this and feel completely consumed by negativity. It is easy for our family, friends and children to be affected by ongoing uncertainty and it is superbly hard to be there for others when we are struggling ourselves in this very moment to stay calm and 'positive'. Positive is used very casually. As a therapist it is a concept that is not often used in my counselling room - the focus is on hope instead... They can be used interchangeably for the purpose of this piece. How do we not drown in what is the present state of all consuming uncertainty which seems to spell nothing but doom? How do we seperate the trees from the forest and move forward? We pause, re-assess and refocus. Some things are out of our control, no amount of thinking or worrying about it will change it. We need to pause long enough to remember this, re-assess what is in our control and refocus on what matters. Ask yourself, who do I want to be today? Then take one step towards something that would contribute to being that person, no matter how small the step, then another and another rest when you need, rinse and repeat.
This is not easy with everything going on around us and sometimes we need a little nudge in the right direction, or a little more concrete advice. In a series of posts to follow we will look at some strategies. The first of them 3 U's for U!
A good place to start is to minimise information overload. Without relying on statistics, there is ample research indicating that being constantly bombarded by 'news' and 'information' does more harm than good. It overwhelms and confuses. I encourage the three U's for U. Unfollow, Unplug, Unwind. Unfollow: 'News' and media cites have been proven to be biased. Debates are popping up in every group we are part of on social media. I have personally seen debates in groups ranging from professional mental health related, to sewing related to hiking related. There is no avoiding these unless you choose to mute or unfollow for a little while. What about my friends?, you may say. You don't have to unfriend your friends, there are settings on social media platforms that allow you to 'take a break' without unfriending your friends. Scroll past, and choose to not engage in comments and debates if unfollow/taking a break is not an option. Remember everyone is entitled to an opinion and opnions are like noses...every person has one! Unplug: Limit the time spent on technology. Television , radio, phone, computer, tablet... whatever your preference limit your time. Less time equals less exposure and less exposure equals more mental real estate to focus on the things that matter. Unwind:
Take time to do what matters. This looks different to everyone. It could be going for a walk or a hike. I could be indulging in a nice meal, or savouring a cup of coffee. Unwinding is about be present and doing something that pleases you or relaxes you.
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